Our Guest: Deanne Ward
Deanne Ward is CEO of Ward Consulting and has worked for more than 30 years in collaborative partnerships with non-profits. Her passion is to impact the lives of others for the cause of Christ. She has traveled to more than 50 countries with this purpose. Deanne has worked with various churches, ministries, and non-profits, establishing and cultivating leadership teams. She has received more than 42 certifications and licenses with behavioral science and counseling focuses. Deanne received her therapist license from the University of Colorado, Boulder. Along with her therapist license, she has received certifications in the following specialties: Crisis Management, Dealing with Difficult Women, Emotional Intelligence, How to Deal with Unacceptable Behavior, Leadership and Management, Life Coaching, Racial Reconciliation, and many more. She has served on a number of non-profit boards, including Hope for the Heart, June Hunt’s ministry, the Taya and Chris Kyle Foundation, and many others. Deanne has cultivated key partnerships with National Center for Healthy Vets, Remount Foundation, GUMI Camp, Shadow Warrior, and Operation Restore Warriors. She currently resides in Colorado Springs with her singer/songwriter husband, Matthew Ward.
Key Thoughts and Scriptures:
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 NIV Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.
- What a beautiful picture of how God designed us to live, not isolated, but surrounded by people who lift us up when life gets heavy
Galatians 6:2 NIV Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.
- Supporting one another isn’t just a nice idea. It’s a vital part of living out our faith.
- Healing and strength often begin when we reach out and let others in. Studies show that having a strong support system not only helps reduce anxiety and depression, but also leads to longer, healthier lives.
Romans 12:15 NIV Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.
- Growing up, Deanne didn’t know that some people didn’t have somewhere to go when life got hard.
- “When we know what we’re supposed to do and we don’t do it, the consequences are much more severe than if you think you know and you’re not sure. God will gently move you back over to His plan for you.”
Deanne took that first big dive into God’s plan, and when she looked back she could see all the little pieces coming together.
- Deanne felt she had to lay down the plans God had given her. But God brought those plans to fruition later in her life.
- There were still times that came where she told God, “I didn’t sign up for this.”
- Those years were a season in Deanne’s life where she had to trust God the most.
- “Yes, I’m gonna trust you with my kids on the road, even though people think I’m crazy to have kids on the road. Okay, yes, Matthew has cancer. Okay, I’ll trust you with this, even though we have three little kids at home.”
- There are times your heart breaks because you know that you made the right decision, but what you’re seeing doesn’t look right and it doesn’t feel right. And it doesn’t. At that point you have to choose to trust again.
- “If I’ve got to trust God with all of that, I don’t think I’m going to take the financial component out of God’s hands and own that one. God’s always come through. He’s always been faithful. He’s always met me.”
Deanne realized that the trials she was going through were not based on her lack of faith.
- “Lazarus was a non-faith participant. The dude was dead. So this is not based on my faith. This is not based on my husband’s faith. This is a season where God’s going to do what He wants to do, how He wants to do it, when He wants to do it.”
- We’ve grown as a church as a whole that you don’t have to just give somebody a scripture and pat them on the back at church. We’ve become much better at taking care of people as a whole person
- When we are in grief, it’s very hard to make decisions.
- After you’ve experienced a really traumatic incident, don’t make any big decisions.
- Deanne had a counselor who said, “So what’s going on?” Not, “How are you?” He allowed her to look forward.
- If you don’t have time to stop and listen to somebody, don’t ask them, “How are you?” Just say, “Good to see you.”
God of Gray
Matthew 7:24-27 NIV “Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash.”
- Deanne’s faith has been tested numerous times, but she was anchored in Christ and scripture. And God brought her through it.
- “How can you be internally stronger after taking months of chemotherapy than you were before we started?” “You don’t know the God I serve.”
- Things are non-changeable. It’s black and white. But God is God of gray.
- “We live in a fallen broken world. Why would I ever think that I would be exempt from having to walk through something like this?”
- There’s some believers that believe when you receive Jesus into your life, that He’s just gonna make it all okay. He doesn’t make it all okay in the journey, sometimes in the process. Can we trust?
- “Matthew’s struggle with cancer had very little to do with us.It was about everybody watching our process, not us.”
- “That’s the biggest compliment you could give me is that you could see God sustaining me. when I didn’t sense it and didn’t know at times.”
Deanne walked through the fire.
Daniel 3 NIV Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego
- Nowhere in that story does it say Shadrach, Meshach, or Abednego saw or sensed God with them.
- But anybody looking in saw the Son of Man.
- They came out without even the smell of smoke.
- “I wanna be able to go through the refiner’s fire without even the smell of smoke. And I want anybody who’s looking in to see and know that God’s with me.”
- There’s great value in the ministry of presence, just being there.
- When I went through some of the stuff, there weren’t any answers. As Deanne’s husband said, “This doesn’t fit with my theology, my theology is gonna have to change.”
- In those dark times is when somebody just needs someone to listen. Just being able to be present is just as valuable as having an answer sometimes.
- God most of the time doesn’t want us to fix it for them because He’s taking them on a journey that’s their journey. Sometimes we try to be so helpful we get in His way.
Practical Tips from Deanne:
- Stop by, but keep it short and respect their need for space.
- When we constantly prevent our kids from the hard stuff, then we don’t equip them well practically.
- Mental health is not mental illness.
- It’s okay to go, “That hurts my heart.”
- And for us to give each other grace to go through anxiety.
- We don’t always allow ourselves that same flexibility.
- God does take us right to the edge.
- The hurting already know what God’s Word says.
- What they need to know is that you’re thinking about them and supporting them.
- Trusting in God comes through actions that God asks us to make. The little things that allow others to see that God really does see them and knows what they’re going through.
- Everybody’s capable of doing something.
- We know what it takes to be a blessing. It takes planning, effort, and time.
- Sometimes God speaks so practically, we don’t even think it’s Him.
- Don’t ignore those nudges.
- We need each other. To be there for one another and know who’s there for us.
- And that’s the only way they’re gonna know is if we make ourselves vulnerable to them and their crisis.
- All those little things, they matter.
- We just have to be obedient and listen.
Abigail’s Story
I Samuel 25 NIV David, Nabal, and Abigail
- Abigail was sensible and saw beyond herself. She was wise and generous.
- Every day Deanne asks God to give her wisdom beyond her years.
- “I can’t do what you’ve asked me to do if I don’t have your wisdom.”
- Also, Abigail brought out the best in people.
- She walked in favor.
- We’re not meant to walk life alone.
1 Thessalonians 5:11 NIV Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.
- The Holy Spirit, through Paul, highlights how important it is to lift one another up.
- Let’s be people who show up, who offer a hand, who speak life and encouragement, because when we do, it’s not just helping each other, it’s really reflecting the very heart of Christ.
- Ask the Lord to lead you into authentic life-giving relationships, and then be open to stepping into them.
- God wastes nothing.
- Everything we go through, everything God teaches us is for His glory and for us to share with others.
2 Thessalonians 2:16-17 NIV May our Lord Jesus Christ himself and God our Father, who loved us and by his grace gave us eternal encouragement and good hope, encourage your hearts and strengthen you in every good deed and word.
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